Funny Things to Say on Facebook

Facebook is an immensely popular social networking platform, and if you happen to be a member, you will come across some extremely funny lines and ideas on Facebook on a day-to-day basis. People really let loose when it comes to their status messages, or when they have to describe themselves in the 'About Me' section, or even when they communicate with their friends and family members by writing on their wall.

Since the entire idea of Facebook is to keep in touch with people and regularly update them about the events in your life, there is certainly nothing wrong with adding more than a little share of humor to the entire procedure. The comments can be about anything and everything under the sun, and the best ones will certainly get a chuckle from all the people whose home pages will display your updates.

Funny Things to Put on Your Facebook Status

Your Facebook status is something that you can update as many times as you want, and it can reflect anything that you are going through at the moment. You can include a quote, an anecdote, an opinion, an idea, a thought or anything else imaginable. There are truly no limitations on the funny things to say on Facebook status messages, and here are some funny Facebook status samples for you.

• My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
• Is proud of himself. He just finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months, and the box said 2 - 4 years.
• Be nice to the people who smoke. Every cigarette may be their last.
• Ambition is the willingness to kill the things you love and eat them to stay alive.
• I am a bomb technician. If you see me running, try to keep up.
• Statistically speaking, around 165% of people exaggerate.
• Statistically speaking, 8/6 people have trouble computing fractions.
• Why can't chickens cross the road without their motives being questioned.
• Not all men are fools. There are still some bachelors left.
• Good morning.... I see the assassins have failed.
• I am amazing at remembering names. I just can't remember which one is yours.
• If you must be taken for a ride, it may as well be in a good car.
• Giving money and power to the Government is like giving alcohol and the car keys to teenagers.
• Used to be schizophrenic. But now both of us are fine.
• Is everything you're not.
• Is as seen on TV.
• I let the dogs out.
• Isha vingtrou blewi thth espaceb ar.
• Would rather check his Facebook, than face his checkbook.
• Just got a grip of reality, and is choking it to death.
• Is not spoiled. Is not, is not is not!!!!
• Is swearing to drunk that he is not God.
• Is making some changes to his life. Leave a message, and if I don't get back to you later, you're one of the changes.
• Bigamy - One wife too many. Monogamy - Same thing.
• If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.
• Why won't you understand me like my iPhone does?
• I woke up on the wrong side of Facebook this morning.
• Why is the newspaper far more interesting when someone else is reading it?
• We can all keep secrets. But the people we tell are not very good at it.
• My girlfriend must have had 61 boyfriends before me. She calls me her sixty second lover.
• Is rejecting your reality and replacing it with his own.